So I did my first 5K on saturday! My one goal (well, apart from finishing it) was to run it more than i walked it. I met that goal, walking about 1/3 of it and running the other 2/3. My sister did it with me and it was a really fun experience. People cheering and yelling and banging cow bells, little kids and old folks and fat men and women, all just out enjoying the sunset and the awesome views. We finished in probably the last third and I gotta say, I knew there would be some competitive thoughts running through my head but it wasn’t as hard to work through them as I thought it would be. “eek, there are only like 50 people behind you” and “what if you’re the last one crossing the finish line?” popped in to my head but I was able to just calm down, breathe, and remind myself that I’ve never done anything like this before and that the point isn’t to blitz by everyone, it’s to focus internally and be present. Like yoga while jogging! Yogging?
I keep coming back to just how far I’ve come in a couple years. Not that long ago, i would have NEVER thought to do something like this, for fear of looking like a total asshole. A fatty who had no business whatsoever running in public. I would have been completely shredded the first time someone looked me up and down. I would have felt like a total poser in dry-fit and running shoes. It is, simply put, absolutely mind-blowing how we can interact with the world in a totally different manner when we decide we don’t give a single fuck about how we “should” do something and what is “appropriate.” I’m not saying there aren’t fucks I give every now and then, but on Saturday, those went away and it was delightful. I am thankful for a body that allows me to do these kinds of things, and I am thankful for a wonderful 5K partner, and I am thankful for my health. And so ends one of the sappiest entries I’ve had in a long time.